


stay by my side

by seawitcher



Series: (even if i'm soft-spoken) please understand me [2]
Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Fluff, M/M, Piercings, Romance, Social Anxiety, Tattoos, parenting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-11
Updated: 2019-05-11
Packaged: 2020-03-01 06:20:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,252
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18794689
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/seawitcher/pseuds/seawitcher
Summary: Jiwoo's dad is different than others. Even at the age of seven, she knows that her dad is unlike any other.But that's why she loves him.





	stay by my side

**Author's Note:**

> welcome to the first of my 5th year anniversary sequels! in which i write sequels to past fics that my readers voted for :3
> 
> this is the sequel to "(even if i'm soft-spoken) please understand me" so pls read that before reading this!

Jiwoo’s dad is different from others. Even at the age of seven, she knows that her dad is unlike any other.

When he comes to pick her up from school, all the other kids and their parents stare at the drawings on his arms and neck and the metal in his face. Her friends says her dad looks weird, but Jiwoo loves tracing the markings when he cuddles her in his lap and reads her a story before bedtime, and she thinks he would look strange without the little rings and studs in his face. They say her dad looks scary, but she disagrees.

Her dad is so nice. He holds her when she cries, he tries to braid her hair even though it’s never even, and he always dances with her while they’re waiting for her papa to finish cooking dinner. Besides, Papa says that Jiwoo’s dad is the strongest man he knows - though he and Dad laugh when Jiwoo curiously pokes her dad’s squishy stomach in response.

Papa never explains to her why her dad is so strong, but Jiwoo slowly begins to understand. He’s never quiet at home, but in public he’s silent, and he lets Jiwoo’s papa do the talking. He doesn’t look very happy when Papa takes them to the crowded mall, and his voice gets weird whenever he has to speak to strangers. It reminds Jiwoo of when she shivers and tries to talk.

But Papa always makes it better. He brightens Dad’s day when he’s sad, and when he holds Dad’s hands, Jiwoo can see him calm down. She wonders how he does it. It’s almost like magic.

And so, when she brings home a letter detailing a future parent-teacher meeting, Jiwoo isn’t worried at all.

“Ah, our Jiwoo is getting into trouble, huh?” Her dad jokes from the dinner table as her Papa squints, reading the letter from where he stands at the stove.

“I’m not!” She defends with a frown.

He laughs that weird, high-pitched laugh of his and leans over to pet her head. “I’m just joking. I know our Jiwoo is the smartest girl in her class.” He smiles reassuringly at her, and Jiwoo can’t resist getting out of her chair and hugging him. She loves her dad.

“She is,” Papa agrees, pushing up his glasses and placing the letter down on the counter. “I can’t wait to brag about her when we meet Mrs. Choi.” He smiles at her, and Jiwoo giggles as her dad clutches her closer to kiss her forehead.

Jiwoo, being an observant child, notices her two dads exchanging a silent look over dinner, one that she recognizes means that they have to have an “adult conversation” later. And in the evening, when Jiwoo’s sitting in the bathtub, she can hear her parents’ quiet voices in their bedroom.

“I can’t go to that conference. I have to be in the recording studio with a client ‘til seven that night.”

“I-I can’t go by m-myself, Kyungsoo.”

“You have to, and you can.”

“I-Is there anyway you c-can…” Her dad sighs. “S-Sorry, I’m f-freaking out a-again.”

“Hey, you’re okay. You know I would do anything to go with you, but I can’t reschedule this one. You’ve met Mrs. Choi, so you know she’s nice. You don’t have to be nervous, Jongin.”

“B-But what if I s-say...wh-what if I-I can’t speak at a-all? Or i-if I embarrass my-myself?”

“You won’t. She’s going to tell you how great our daughter is, and you’re going to say thank you and take Jiwoo to get ice cream.”

Ice cream? Jiwoo splashes in the bath happily. She’s heard all she needs to hear and stops listening to focus on her bath toys. It’s only a minute or two later that her papa comes in and tells her that bath time is over, and it’s time to go to bed.

 

The older Jongin’s gotten, the more he’s learned how to deal with his anxiety. Coping mechanisms and his husband have helped him more than any medication he’s tried, but he’s a lot better than he used to be. Though Jongin doubts himself sometimes, and that’s when his anxiety gets the best of him.

He’s gotten so used to Kyungsoo’s presence over the years that meeting Jiwoo’s teacher without him is terrifying. Kyungsoo is the one who’s good at words, the one who picks up calls from school, and the one who has done most of the talking when they’ve met Jiwoo’s teachers before. Situations like this already terrify Jongin, but without Kyungsoo, he’s even more terrified.

He hates that fact.

The impending appointment with Mrs. Choi weighs on his shoulders the entire day. He can hardly focus in the studio or in the staff meeting beforehand, and during the time he’s planned to make up a routine for his little ballerinas, Jongin only listens to the music and stares off into space. All he can think about is that meeting, and how he doesn’t want to go, and how he’s afraid of embarrassing himself.

He knows his fears would sound ridiculous to any normal person, so when his co-workers ask what’s wrong, Jongin chalks it up to fatigue. Ironically, he would love to go home and lie in bed for the rest of the day and let Kyungsoo deal with this.

“Just breathe, Jongin,” Kyungsoo had told him the night before. “You know where you’re going. You’ve met Mrs. Choi before, and you know that you’re just going to listen and learn about Jiwoo’s progress in school. It’s gonna be alright, and you can do this without me.”

As the time approached and Jongin climbed into his car, he seriously doubts Kyungsoo was right.

He has to admit that a fraction of the worry goes away when Jiwoo runs into his arms at the gate of her school. She’s been the light of his life ever since he held her for the first time, from the surrogate’s arms to his own. Jiwoo was possibly the scariest thing to ever happen to him, but Jongin wouldn’t trade her for the world.

“Hey, baby.” Jongin smiles at her. “Did you have a good day?”

“Yeah! Are we gonna go get ice cream?” Jiwoo jumps up and down, eyes sparkling. 

Jongin snorts. Of course she had heard them talking that night, their ever-attentive daughter. Shaking his head, he straightens up and offers his hand. “I have to m-meet with Mrs. Choi first, remember?”

“Then ice cream?” She tilts her head.

“Then ice cream.” Jongin chuckles and then turns to face the school building with a sigh. If only he could just run away and take his daughter to get ice cream.

He checks the time on his phone a total of three times as they make the journey to the faculty office. Too early and it would make for awkward waiting time, and too late and Jongin would seem irresponsible. It ends up not mattering at all as another parent is already in a meeting with Mrs. Choi, so Jongin and Jiwoo are directed to sit on a bench outside of the office, waiting their turn.

Jongin hates waiting as it’s when his anxiety has a lot of room to take over his mind.

His heart pounds in his chest, and he moves his left leg up and down as his mind races through all the different ways he could potentially embarrass himself. Jiwoo sits next to him, recounting her day at school to him, but Jongin can hardly pay attention. He’s just terrified with his stomach tied in knots.

“Daddy, when your hair was white did it hurt?” Jiwoo suddenly asks.

“H-Huh?” Such a random question knocks him out of his thoughts.

“Papa showed me pictures of when your hair was white. He said you put stuff in it to make it turn white. Did it hurt?” She looks up at him with curious eyes.

“A-A little, but o-only when I-I got it done. I-It didn’t hurt a-after that,” Jongin answers, internally reprimanding himself after stuttering in front of Jiwoo again. He hates when his voice does it around her as it makes him feel weak in front of his own daughter.

“Oh.” Jiwoo looks back down at her own feet, furrowing her thick brows in thought. “The metal?”

“P-Piercings. O-Only once.”

“The drawings on your body?”

“T-Tattoos, and y-yes.”

Jiwoo nods like an intelligent scholar would at his scientific findings. She then scoots closer to Jongin on the bench and leans against him, hugging his arm. “This too,” she says.

Jongin looks at her in confusion. “What?”

She hugs his arm tighter and looks up at her father with a smile. “This will hurt once too! I’m hugging you like Papa does, so you can stay strong.” Her smile brightens, twin dimples showing on her cheeks.

Jongin’s eyes widen and his heart leaps in his chest. Despite feeling a little embarrassed that his daughter saw those rare moments of Kyungsoo having to calm him down, Jongin feels tears spring to his eyes out of love and adoration. Part of him feels proud that they’re already raising their daughter to be compassionate, while another part of him feels reassurance rushing through his veins. He has Jiwoo by his side. He isn’t alone.

Wrapping an arm around her, Jongin clutches her closer and kisses the top of her head. “I-I feel strong j-just by having you by my side, Jiwoo.”

As their names are called and he gets side-eyed by the mother and child exiting the staff room, Jongin isn’t bothered at all. His steps feel lighter and his mind clearer as he follows an excited Jiwoo inside. Maybe the world isn’t so scary even if he doesn’t have Kyungsoo with him. Jiwoo will always be here for him too.

The meeting goes smoothly and pleasantly, as does their visit to the ice cream shop just after.

 

“I think Jiwoo knows about my anxiety.”

Kyungsoo rolls over in bed to look at his husband staring at the ceiling, surprised at the sudden conversation even though they had just said goodnight to each other. “Did something happen today? I thought you said the meeting went really well.”

“It did.” Jongin smiles, turning to face Kyungsoo. “She comforted me because she had seen you doing it before.”

“Ah.” Kyungsoo chuckles, moving closer and laying his head back down on the pillow. “I guess she learns from the best.”

Jongin hits him playfully on the shoulder. “Meanie,” he pouts. “You still owe me after I went to that meeting all on my own.”

“I do?” Kyungsoo raises a brow. “Me? Your supporting husband who only wants to push you to be a greater person?”

With a huff, Jongin drags his husband over to lie against his bare chest, hugging him close even though this position will become too hot. “I want my supporting husband to take our family to  _ EXOland _ .”

Kyungsoo wrinkles his nose. “That old amusement park? You know it’s not really at its prime anymore, right?”

“Yes, but it’s where we met. I think it would be nice to relive the memories with Jiwoo,” Jongin suggests. Though the two of them only worked at  _ EXOland  _ for a couple of summers in the sweltering heat, they were some of Jongin’s favorite memories. Quite frankly he doesn’t know where he would be if he hadn’t met Kyungsoo back then.

Sighing, Kyungsoo settles into Jongin’s arms and closes his eyes. “I guess so. I still think about you in those overalls every now and then.” He chuckles.

“I was pretty cute, huh?” Jongin jokes.

“You were a cute kid. I remember when you were too shy to even hold my hand and got nervous every time you talked to me. How could I leave you alone?” Opening his eyes, he looks up at Jongin with a loving gaze. “And now we’re married and have a whole kid.”

Jongin barks out a quick laugh. “A whole kid indeed.”

“Speaking of kids, I’ve been thinking…” Kyungsoo suddenly gets up, sitting on Jongin’s hips. “Do you want to have another?”

Even to this day, Jongin still flushes pink at Kyungsoo’s suggestive posture. “Uh...Y-You mean finding another surrogate, right?” His hands move to Kyungsoo’s waist, thumbing the band of his boxer-briefs.

Kyungsoo rolls his eyes. “Of course, pervert. Would you want to? I think we can handle another baby, right?”

It isn’t like Jongin hasn’t thought about it. Jiwoo is growing up so fast, and sometimes he misses holding a little baby in his arms. She’s been asking for a younger sibling ever since she could speak, and if Kyungsoo and Jongin could have one on their own, they would have given in sooner.

“Yeah,” Jongin replies with a soft smile. “Let’s do it. Let’s have another baby.”

“Yes!” Kyungsoo cheers quietly, lips curling into an excited grin. Placing his hands on the bed on either side of Jongin’s head, he leans down to kiss him, slow and sweet. “We should celebrate,” he breathes into the kiss.

“We should.” Jongin’s arms wrap around Kyungsoo’s hips and pull him closer. 

Later that night, when they’re tired and sated, curled up in each other’s arms, Jongin thinks that this is true happiness. He wonders how lucky he is to have met Kyungsoo that fateful day at the park, to have found someone who would accept him the way he is. He has a lovely life and family, and he wouldn’t wish it any different. It’s perfection.

**Author's Note:**

> thanks so much for reading! keep an eye out for my other upcoming postings! you can see updates on my twitter @jongintxt
> 
> kudos, comments, and bookmarks are appreciated!


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